Wednesday, May 22, 2019
Thursday, May 16, 2019
how to file a formal complaint in 10 [not so] simple steps
the basics of a formal complaint, one that gets attention and garners respect from the business you complain to and also results in actions taken or compensatory goods, is simple.
1. be polite.
this is important as you want them to see you as someone whom is miffed, but also is reasonable
2. be well written/spoken in your words.
try not to use contractions like cant, wont, dont, its, [etc.] and make sure that what you want comes across clear. use proper english and grammar and make sure you come across as "educated and logical]
3. write your !@#$ you draft first.
nobody ever suggests this. but what you want is to write out literally everything you feel at the moment you want to complain. even swears and contractions and have it come across as rediculous and p!$$ed off as possible. then either erase it, or modifiy it so it comes across as someone upset but not blind swearing into an empty toilet. it helps to write your e-mail/letter in word or notepad in case you lose internet connection.
4. make sure your complaint is valid.
check the faq [if they have one] before contacting the busniess, and yes faqs p!$$ the hell out of everyone. such stupid nonsensical questions. how the f@@k is "can it connect to internet?" a frequently asked question about a friggin toaster?!? the heck kind of toast are these people trying to make? but always make sure your complaint is something reasonable that you feel thewe company should own up to.
5. dont use references.
not what you think. im talking things like youtube, social media, twitter, tinder, "myponylikesbutteredtoast.com". dont reference things like this unless they are 100% relevant to your complaint.
6. dont use personal info [address, phone number].
unless, you want them calling you or sending you things in the mail. also you should know that many businesses sometimes end up selling out personal e-mails and phone numbers to spam companies who fill your inbox, phone, and every murderous donut-related though you have [great.... now i want a razberry filled donut]. you will need to check busniess privacy laws and regulations to know. but if you spam them with complaints and your personal phone number, address, or e-mail dont be shocked if you suddenly start getting sh!+ loads of spam.
7. dont expect them to give you free sh!+.
yeah, writing professional complaints may get you noticed or get personal letters/e-mails from the compnay. but it is actually quite rare for a business to provide free merchandise to people filing formal complaints. this is an honest action done on the bahalf of you and others like yourself, expecting free crap and getting free crap is a detriment to the company. if they compensate too many or too much they can lose profits or worse lose public image.
8. try to make your complaint sound like a group.
okay this is a real pro tip. when complaining to a busniess or really in general, it helps your case if you can make it sound like others like you could [or even have] suffered the same indignity. one person complaining hardly does anything. usually. if you are persistent they sometimes will compensate you to just get you to stop. im the guy who held a gun in its case in front of an entire meijer store because the stocker place the rifle on a shelf with a far faaar lower price. i literally had nothing to do while waiting for the bus to come back around so we could get on. several shoppers freaked out about high powered pellet rifles "just being out where anyone could grab them". so the store manager offered me a big discount on the thing. which i took. i still have that rifle today locked safely in a gun box in my closet, gun safety is no joke people!
9. if you can find a way, make the company know the problem could be worse.
yes. i disasterize sometimes when filing formal complaints. but when you have pet supplies being shipped completely slashed to pieces in the shipping box, thats a problem. specially if someone orders rat poison and dog food or like LITERALLY anything compressed in a canister [big box go boom now]. the idea is to take your minor problem and make it something that very realistically could become major [if it isnt already]. it may seem wrong, but murphys law can turn something harmless into a disaster [columbine happened because some idiot sold teens firearms and stores had no age restrictions on propane sales.] these things are very real and happen every day. the titanic disaster happened simply because production skimped costs on the rivets that held the ship together. you dont need to turn everything into a disaster, but if you can literally write out how your small issue could lead to a huge disaster for the company they will likely listen.
10. "pics or it didnt happen"
yeah this one had to be the last on the list. if you REALLY want results, give the business friggin evidence. this case with jimmy johns that got me gift cards had me actually citing everything and quoting from live time research. words mean nothing without actions and actions have no meaning without cause. any evidence you can collect to support your claims will further help your cause. doesmnt always need to be pics, but photo and video is hard to dispute.
i will list below all the cases i filed and got responses from. including total failures on the companies behalf.
1. be polite.
this is important as you want them to see you as someone whom is miffed, but also is reasonable
2. be well written/spoken in your words.
try not to use contractions like cant, wont, dont, its, [etc.] and make sure that what you want comes across clear. use proper english and grammar and make sure you come across as "educated and logical]
3. write your !@#$ you draft first.
nobody ever suggests this. but what you want is to write out literally everything you feel at the moment you want to complain. even swears and contractions and have it come across as rediculous and p!$$ed off as possible. then either erase it, or modifiy it so it comes across as someone upset but not blind swearing into an empty toilet. it helps to write your e-mail/letter in word or notepad in case you lose internet connection.
4. make sure your complaint is valid.
check the faq [if they have one] before contacting the busniess, and yes faqs p!$$ the hell out of everyone. such stupid nonsensical questions. how the f@@k is "can it connect to internet?" a frequently asked question about a friggin toaster?!? the heck kind of toast are these people trying to make? but always make sure your complaint is something reasonable that you feel thewe company should own up to.
5. dont use references.
not what you think. im talking things like youtube, social media, twitter, tinder, "myponylikesbutteredtoast.com". dont reference things like this unless they are 100% relevant to your complaint.
6. dont use personal info [address, phone number].
unless, you want them calling you or sending you things in the mail. also you should know that many businesses sometimes end up selling out personal e-mails and phone numbers to spam companies who fill your inbox, phone, and every murderous donut-related though you have [great.... now i want a razberry filled donut]. you will need to check busniess privacy laws and regulations to know. but if you spam them with complaints and your personal phone number, address, or e-mail dont be shocked if you suddenly start getting sh!+ loads of spam.
7. dont expect them to give you free sh!+.
yeah, writing professional complaints may get you noticed or get personal letters/e-mails from the compnay. but it is actually quite rare for a business to provide free merchandise to people filing formal complaints. this is an honest action done on the bahalf of you and others like yourself, expecting free crap and getting free crap is a detriment to the company. if they compensate too many or too much they can lose profits or worse lose public image.
8. try to make your complaint sound like a group.
okay this is a real pro tip. when complaining to a busniess or really in general, it helps your case if you can make it sound like others like you could [or even have] suffered the same indignity. one person complaining hardly does anything. usually. if you are persistent they sometimes will compensate you to just get you to stop. im the guy who held a gun in its case in front of an entire meijer store because the stocker place the rifle on a shelf with a far faaar lower price. i literally had nothing to do while waiting for the bus to come back around so we could get on. several shoppers freaked out about high powered pellet rifles "just being out where anyone could grab them". so the store manager offered me a big discount on the thing. which i took. i still have that rifle today locked safely in a gun box in my closet, gun safety is no joke people!
9. if you can find a way, make the company know the problem could be worse.
yes. i disasterize sometimes when filing formal complaints. but when you have pet supplies being shipped completely slashed to pieces in the shipping box, thats a problem. specially if someone orders rat poison and dog food or like LITERALLY anything compressed in a canister [big box go boom now]. the idea is to take your minor problem and make it something that very realistically could become major [if it isnt already]. it may seem wrong, but murphys law can turn something harmless into a disaster [columbine happened because some idiot sold teens firearms and stores had no age restrictions on propane sales.] these things are very real and happen every day. the titanic disaster happened simply because production skimped costs on the rivets that held the ship together. you dont need to turn everything into a disaster, but if you can literally write out how your small issue could lead to a huge disaster for the company they will likely listen.
10. "pics or it didnt happen"
yeah this one had to be the last on the list. if you REALLY want results, give the business friggin evidence. this case with jimmy johns that got me gift cards had me actually citing everything and quoting from live time research. words mean nothing without actions and actions have no meaning without cause. any evidence you can collect to support your claims will further help your cause. doesmnt always need to be pics, but photo and video is hard to dispute.
i will list below all the cases i filed and got responses from. including total failures on the companies behalf.
i complained to customer service - and jimmy johns rewarded me?!? [how to file a formal complaint]
ok, lets get this started with the fact that i FRIGGIN LOVE SANDWICHES.
take two pieces of bread place LITERALLY anything between it, SANDWICH!
take two slices of turkey and place cheese between them, SANDWICH!
take two cookies and put icing between them, OREO! its LIKE a sandwich, only its 2.5 cookies.
take two wooden boards, some shellack, and a piece of tree bark, SANDWICH! would i eat it? actually i once ate a twig on a dare, but thats another story.
whatever, i love sandwiches.
while on this topic, i frequently order and eat at various sandwich restaurants. even a burger is a sandwich, only its meat and bread are roided out and bad ass. i have eaten at potbelly sandwich shop, subway, penn station, and one of my favorites, jimmy johns. any chance i get to order delivery i always opt for healthy choices, which jimmy johns has a ton. sadly jimmy johns cannot deliver to my address, and after unsuccesfully voicing my complaint over the phone i decided to STRAIGHT UP as them directly why they cannot deliver to my address.
so i went to customer service online and wrote a well written e-mail. now normally when you complain it is annonymous as you do not want them coming back at you. but i decided to put all my chips on the table, and i gave them the address of the nearest restaurant to my home. i then gave them my REAL address [btw NEVER EVER do this with anyone anonymously and if you want to know why just cheack out reddit under the topic "'let's not meet' stories"]. i then went further and used mapquest to test the travel time from my home to their business [which was minimum 9 minutes and max 13].
i didnt just ask why they couldnt deliver, i went and showed they could deliver to my place in about 11 minutes [or one episode of your average tv cartoon show]. i then asked a simple question, "why is it that your business, being so close, cannot deliver?" honestly i did not AT ALL expect a reply from them. but lo and behold, like a week later i get an envelope from them in the mail; and inside i feel something the size of a credit card.
i call in my roommate and we open the envelope, and inside was a personally written letter from jimmy johns. they apologized for being in an inconvenient location and as compensation for... something.... [i dont really know, i just wanted my question answered]; they sent me a ten dollar friggin gift card and a ten dollar gas card.
[will insert photo later. yah im lazy like a cat, bite me]
gods only know why they felt they needed to go over the edge in customer service and give me such a great gift. [yes ten bucks in trumps nation will buy you a loaf of bread, but now that bread comes with jimmy johns sandwich meat!] my roommate got the ten dollar gas card and i got the food gift card.
anyone who reads about my reviews knows that i pretty much treat things i hate the same as things i like. my passion and wrath run equal, and if someone screws up i always give them a second chance [^ ^ down down < > < > ab start INFINITE SECOND CHANCES!] even when someone screws up royal i will always give them a chance to make things right [still waiting on walmart though for nearly letting me die].
if you like sandwiches try a local sandwich shop, doesnt have to be jimmy johns [thats how you know this sh!+ is not sponsored]. but they do have good sandwiches, and they sell loaves of bread for like 50cents a pop. thats cheaper than the grocery store.
well im off to play some yoshi and poochies wooly world. [seriously its a great game. no really it is. very VERY relaxing. soothing music]
as for how to file a formal complaint, i will go into further detail in another post, as well as include like LITERALLY every single formal response i recieved and what happened as a result of my actions [i am not bragging either, just showing what can be done when you are well worded and polite]. if you wish to learn about how to write a formal complaint, check out the link below:
https://storymaster21.blogspot.com/2019/05/how-to-file-formal-complaint-in-10-not.html?zx=3facfe5e7c177883
take two pieces of bread place LITERALLY anything between it, SANDWICH!
take two slices of turkey and place cheese between them, SANDWICH!
take two cookies and put icing between them, OREO! its LIKE a sandwich, only its 2.5 cookies.
take two wooden boards, some shellack, and a piece of tree bark, SANDWICH! would i eat it? actually i once ate a twig on a dare, but thats another story.
whatever, i love sandwiches.
while on this topic, i frequently order and eat at various sandwich restaurants. even a burger is a sandwich, only its meat and bread are roided out and bad ass. i have eaten at potbelly sandwich shop, subway, penn station, and one of my favorites, jimmy johns. any chance i get to order delivery i always opt for healthy choices, which jimmy johns has a ton. sadly jimmy johns cannot deliver to my address, and after unsuccesfully voicing my complaint over the phone i decided to STRAIGHT UP as them directly why they cannot deliver to my address.
so i went to customer service online and wrote a well written e-mail. now normally when you complain it is annonymous as you do not want them coming back at you. but i decided to put all my chips on the table, and i gave them the address of the nearest restaurant to my home. i then gave them my REAL address [btw NEVER EVER do this with anyone anonymously and if you want to know why just cheack out reddit under the topic "'let's not meet' stories"]. i then went further and used mapquest to test the travel time from my home to their business [which was minimum 9 minutes and max 13].
i didnt just ask why they couldnt deliver, i went and showed they could deliver to my place in about 11 minutes [or one episode of your average tv cartoon show]. i then asked a simple question, "why is it that your business, being so close, cannot deliver?" honestly i did not AT ALL expect a reply from them. but lo and behold, like a week later i get an envelope from them in the mail; and inside i feel something the size of a credit card.
i call in my roommate and we open the envelope, and inside was a personally written letter from jimmy johns. they apologized for being in an inconvenient location and as compensation for... something.... [i dont really know, i just wanted my question answered]; they sent me a ten dollar friggin gift card and a ten dollar gas card.
[will insert photo later. yah im lazy like a cat, bite me]
gods only know why they felt they needed to go over the edge in customer service and give me such a great gift. [yes ten bucks in trumps nation will buy you a loaf of bread, but now that bread comes with jimmy johns sandwich meat!] my roommate got the ten dollar gas card and i got the food gift card.
anyone who reads about my reviews knows that i pretty much treat things i hate the same as things i like. my passion and wrath run equal, and if someone screws up i always give them a second chance [^ ^ down down < > < > ab start INFINITE SECOND CHANCES!] even when someone screws up royal i will always give them a chance to make things right [still waiting on walmart though for nearly letting me die].
if you like sandwiches try a local sandwich shop, doesnt have to be jimmy johns [thats how you know this sh!+ is not sponsored]. but they do have good sandwiches, and they sell loaves of bread for like 50cents a pop. thats cheaper than the grocery store.
well im off to play some yoshi and poochies wooly world. [seriously its a great game. no really it is. very VERY relaxing. soothing music]
as for how to file a formal complaint, i will go into further detail in another post, as well as include like LITERALLY every single formal response i recieved and what happened as a result of my actions [i am not bragging either, just showing what can be done when you are well worded and polite]. if you wish to learn about how to write a formal complaint, check out the link below:
https://storymaster21.blogspot.com/2019/05/how-to-file-formal-complaint-in-10-not.html?zx=3facfe5e7c177883
Wednesday, May 8, 2019
movie idea 2 - "the facade heartland"
this would make a great movie plot, based off the scam agencies that use tech scams to steal billions of dollars per year from unsupecting people. link below to jimbrowning on youtube, he does informative videos on these matters.
Inside a scam call center [ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xb_rgQ4IDS8 ]
Inside a scam call center [ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xb_rgQ4IDS8 ]
two people in the middle east trying to make ends meet who grew up as best friends and knew each other their entire lives. mamuk [mah-mook] and chabuud [shaa-bood]. after finishing high school they both want to make it big and marry the perfect spouse to start a family. they both get jobs, with mamuk working honest customer service for a major tech company ans chabuud also getting work for a tech firm.
later mamuk learns that chabuud is working for a scammer agency and their friendship gets put to the test. mamuk is like "thees ees honest munee my friend. it is hard work, but worth eet in thee end." and chabuud is like "yes buut my job pays soo much more and i am rich now". so chabuud shows off all the beautiful people he is dating and the expensive things he is buying to try to both make mamuk jealous and recruit him to also work in the scam center.
mamuk begins having a crisis of ethics as he needs more money to save one of his family members lives because they get into an accident. he considers working at the illegal call center, and we as viewers see him walking towards the scam center as they have the manager preparing for another employee joining them.
we assume it is mamuk, but it is not as we see mamuk walk PAST the call center to a profiessional office building. turns out his hard work was notices and he gets promoted to a managerial position. then later we see the scam center get broken into by federal agents as the reveal the "new employee" was an undercover officer and everyone in the scam center [including chabuud] is arrested and sent to federal prison.
the movie ends with mamuk seeing his best friend to jail and promising to always visit, and giving a short lecture about ethics and fraud. then we get a sad dark theme song that has text credits with details about scam agencies in the real world and their devastating effects. and the sheer lack of action that the law takes against them in spite of the overwhelming evidence.
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