oops, i blooped
have you ever wished you had a blooper roll of your own life? im walking home with my friend talking about meeting a girl who has an overprotective father. im talking and i say "i could imagine her dad pulling me close and saying that if i hurt his daughter he'll cut my balls off and eat them. of course i meant to say that he would cut them off and make me eat them.
"katie and the black bootie" "kado and the black beauty"
"pantsformers free" "transformers 3"
"buy an xbox so i can play modern warcraft 5" that was intentional
apparently my life has become damnyouautocorrect.com. except the idiots who are stupid enough to get on that site dont understand you can turn off the autocorrect. so imtoodumbtoturnoffmyautocorrectandnowimanidiotknownworldwide.com should be its real name. and yes you can turn off autocorrect on any phone. its in the phone settings section.
sometimes we say or do things so hilarious or goofy that we wish that we could turn back time and replay them. from naming games that dont exist to the penis in my butt, i have a shit load of funny things ive done and said.
screwing up game names:
1. modern warcraft 5
2. modern gears of warcraft creed bullet city 2
3. band of boners
4. call of booty
5. dicksiders 2
6. super mario boners
7. mario brothels
8. asassins weed
what the hell did i just say?:
1. theres a rupee in my anus
2. cross my heart hope to die, stick a penis in my eye
3. shield eat pussy
4. theres a penis in my butt
5. theres a hot dog in my anus
6. i do bad things with my hands when i get bored
7. when i get home im making a boner sandwich
though the things said are usually phallic, sometimes i do say funny things that are very creative. anyone who needs drugs or autocorrect to have funny things happen have never truly lived a life. hell i once fell straight through a gong stand during a marching band competition, WITH THE GONG IN MY HANDS. i got back up and put the gong back up without being phased, but people did wonder where i vanished to.
if you havent had at least one thing happen in your life that made you laugh til you snorted you havent lived life enough. its not always about being serious and following rules. sometimes you just need to be crazy for the sake of being crazy. i do things usually because i can, not because i have to or want to.
though life can be fun sometimes we have to do things that we just dont want to. gong to school, breaking up, getting surgery, all of us have things we dont want to do; its about inspiration. if you cant find it from someone else, then inspire yourself.
life may be a race, but if you dont stop to smell the flowers and sunshine you will live to regret it and regret it you will.
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